Thursday, July 16, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Bars Scared of Lawyers
Hey, I'm a lawyer and no one's scared of me! But get David Raybin out there and they all shake in their boots, even ostensibly tough guys like Doc Holliday. Humph! I'm headed to Robert's Western World, where I'll,....well...I'll stick out like a sore thumb probably, but at least it's a hypocrite-free zone!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Safety Update!
Had to drop a work-related package off at a FedEx Kinko's (or whatever they're calling it now) that just happens to be a few hundred feet from a Ruby Tuesday's. I realize that I was "tempting fate" by being so near a potentially dangerous place, but, I mean, what can you do? You gotta earn a living. It just irritates me that I live in a state run by gun nuts. Seriously, I firmly believe the entire state should change its ways because I allow my mind to go into overdrive developing numerous zany scenarios in which I or a loved one gets hit by a stray bullet ricocheting off a saucepan.
Happy to say I made it in and out of the place unscathed. But I'll keep you posted. Stay safe.
Happy to say I made it in and out of the place unscathed. But I'll keep you posted. Stay safe.
Questions & Answers
Time for a few Q/As!
Q: Are you some kind of gun nut?
A: Nope. Not very gun-savvy, I'm afraid. Don't know much about them. I mean, I know bullets come out of them and that bullets can really hurt you, kill you even if it's done right, but beyond that I don't know much. You know how in movies when the hero is trying to save some innocent person in a firefight and he somehow gets an extra gun and then asks the innocent person if he "knows how to use this," and the innocent person says something like "hell yeah, I was in Vietnam" or some such, or maybe just "uh, yeah I think so"? Well, that wouldn't be me. My answer would be something like, "Well, no, not really. Tell you what, why don't you shoot these guys and I'll just blog about it later."
Q: Aren't you scared of guns?
A: I'm generally not afraid of inanimate objects.
Q: Oh, well, you think you're cute, don't you? Guns are dangerous.
A: No. People can be dangerous. But guns are not.
Q: Right. But people with guns are dangerous.
A: Only a relative few of them. Have you ever noticed that for all the talk about our pervasive gun culture in America there are really very few gun crimes--relatively speaking anyway? Hell, reform our drug laws and you'll get rid of most of the gun crime we have now.
Q: So you would take your children to a restaurant that allows people to bring in guns?
A: Yep. No worries there. News flash: You're probably already bringing your children into places where people have guns with them; you just don't know it. Guns and gun owners are everywhere. You're just not aware of it because they're not shooting up everything the way you assume they would be.
Q: Come on, seriously. You've got two children, one six, and the other two. Who would you rather have sitting at the table next to you? Someone like Say Uncle, who could be armed, or someone like Steve Steffens, who would not.
A: Oh, heck, not even a close call. I've never met either of them, but I've read enough of their stuff to know that I would much prefer to sit next to Say Uncle. Heck, I'd even ask him to show my kids his gun (assuming he had one on him--probably a safe assumption), although there's a fair chance that my kids, who are currently on a Star Wars kick--would prefer to see a light saber. Whereas Steve Steffens would probably just drone on about rich Republicans, single-payer health care or something like that, boring my family to tears and just generally ruining our meal and that of other folks who have actual lives. And that's the purpose of this blog, to give people information about the places where the Steve Steffenses of the world will be hanging out, so that the rest of us--gun-lovers or not--can enjoy our nights out.
Q: Are you some kind of gun nut?
A: Nope. Not very gun-savvy, I'm afraid. Don't know much about them. I mean, I know bullets come out of them and that bullets can really hurt you, kill you even if it's done right, but beyond that I don't know much. You know how in movies when the hero is trying to save some innocent person in a firefight and he somehow gets an extra gun and then asks the innocent person if he "knows how to use this," and the innocent person says something like "hell yeah, I was in Vietnam" or some such, or maybe just "uh, yeah I think so"? Well, that wouldn't be me. My answer would be something like, "Well, no, not really. Tell you what, why don't you shoot these guys and I'll just blog about it later."
Q: Aren't you scared of guns?
A: I'm generally not afraid of inanimate objects.
Q: Oh, well, you think you're cute, don't you? Guns are dangerous.
A: No. People can be dangerous. But guns are not.
Q: Right. But people with guns are dangerous.
A: Only a relative few of them. Have you ever noticed that for all the talk about our pervasive gun culture in America there are really very few gun crimes--relatively speaking anyway? Hell, reform our drug laws and you'll get rid of most of the gun crime we have now.
Q: So you would take your children to a restaurant that allows people to bring in guns?
A: Yep. No worries there. News flash: You're probably already bringing your children into places where people have guns with them; you just don't know it. Guns and gun owners are everywhere. You're just not aware of it because they're not shooting up everything the way you assume they would be.
Q: Come on, seriously. You've got two children, one six, and the other two. Who would you rather have sitting at the table next to you? Someone like Say Uncle, who could be armed, or someone like Steve Steffens, who would not.
A: Oh, heck, not even a close call. I've never met either of them, but I've read enough of their stuff to know that I would much prefer to sit next to Say Uncle. Heck, I'd even ask him to show my kids his gun (assuming he had one on him--probably a safe assumption), although there's a fair chance that my kids, who are currently on a Star Wars kick--would prefer to see a light saber. Whereas Steve Steffens would probably just drone on about rich Republicans, single-payer health care or something like that, boring my family to tears and just generally ruining our meal and that of other folks who have actual lives. And that's the purpose of this blog, to give people information about the places where the Steve Steffenses of the world will be hanging out, so that the rest of us--gun-lovers or not--can enjoy our nights out.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Hi There!
Welcome!
The purpose of this blog is simple: we are offering access to a list of restaurants in Tennessee that people who pee their pants at even the very thought of guns are planning to patronize.
I believe, as the majority of Tennesseans do, that no one should have to eat near someone who may lose control of his or her bladder and/or bowels just because a gun is:
1) in his or her presence, even if safely carried by a law-abiding citizen, or
2) something that others in the restaurant might think is an OK thing for law-abiding citizens to have on their persons.
I also believe, but am not 100% sure, that access to this list will also keep you from having your dinner interrupted by the ravings of self-important jackasses demanding that restaurant proprietors turn off Fox News on restaurant televisions.
If this sounds like a lot of work to you, well, no worries on that score. Since we have actual lives and therefore do not let ourselves get worked up about ridiculous things, we're not really going to do much ourselves. No, we're simply going to let those who apparently have very little going on in their own lives to do the work for us by linking to their sites.
Here you go:
http://saferestaurantstennessee.blogspot.com/
http://eatgunfreetn.wordpress.com/
By referring to these sites and using the information therein, you can be more assured of a pleasant meal when you go out by not frequenting those particular places. At the very least, you can drastically lower your chances of having to sit anywhere in the vicinity of Steve Steffens, which, you must admit, is a net positive any way you look at it.
The purpose of this blog is simple: we are offering access to a list of restaurants in Tennessee that people who pee their pants at even the very thought of guns are planning to patronize.
I believe, as the majority of Tennesseans do, that no one should have to eat near someone who may lose control of his or her bladder and/or bowels just because a gun is:
1) in his or her presence, even if safely carried by a law-abiding citizen, or
2) something that others in the restaurant might think is an OK thing for law-abiding citizens to have on their persons.
I also believe, but am not 100% sure, that access to this list will also keep you from having your dinner interrupted by the ravings of self-important jackasses demanding that restaurant proprietors turn off Fox News on restaurant televisions.
If this sounds like a lot of work to you, well, no worries on that score. Since we have actual lives and therefore do not let ourselves get worked up about ridiculous things, we're not really going to do much ourselves. No, we're simply going to let those who apparently have very little going on in their own lives to do the work for us by linking to their sites.
Here you go:
http://saferestaurantstennessee.blogspot.com/
http://eatgunfreetn.wordpress.com/
By referring to these sites and using the information therein, you can be more assured of a pleasant meal when you go out by not frequenting those particular places. At the very least, you can drastically lower your chances of having to sit anywhere in the vicinity of Steve Steffens, which, you must admit, is a net positive any way you look at it.
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